life full of possibility

photo courtesy of fashion gone rogue.

Today I have been reading a book. Sort of. It's by a group called the Icarus Project and it's about the things I deal with.

I wrote down a bunch of notes, initially just to keep them and read them later. Then I did. Then, I felt like expanding and making something with them.

These are not all my words, but more an arrangement and collaboration between text in the book and what I made up as I went.

I'm sorry if you don't understand this. I just feel like expressing and being OK with it.

It's called Life Full of Possibility. god, im fucking arrogant. i can't believe that I'm even titling this tripe.

I make my maps out of colors and sounds
I take my shoes off to feel the ground
the soaring moments like eyes full of horizon
contoured heart is the outline of rocky sunrise
fractal branches of threads understanding

this man was supposed to heal me
the slashes where you watch should go
are nasty habits for girls like me
because they leave scars

he was supposed to have the healing magic key
he was supposed to be my hope
my up-side out of sideways

i wanted to kick his ass

at least
it was a relief
it was not because i was weak
countering mine and my fathers pointed index
scrutiny was now my own

feeling as though everything that these eyes have seen
this heart has felt
has been merely a fabrication of lunacy
i will not accept.

Feelings real
eyes peeled
you cant take that away
nononononononono, nor will i let you.

these reductive words are not the blueprint to my soul
they're the nearest and faultiest approximation
to a soul not understood by doctah, doctah, mister this mister that
i trust you just about as far as i can throw you
this all seems a ridiculous approach to your acceptance of me.


I guess that's all I have to say today. I'm cancelling my AU plan, and gonna get a prepaid in the event I decide to leave, I won't be leaving anything behind unpaid.

I love you, and Thank you.

Via Con Divinidad.